The link in my life between Natalie Portman and Saint Augustine

There was a small column in a newspaper a few weeks ago about the actress Natalie Portman. She is engaged and expecting her first child. I read this much to my dismay as I’ve made it painfully obvious in the course of my blogs over the past year and a half that I’ve had a longtime crush on this beautiful and intelligent lady. So that is another door closed. I should be happy for her but part of me was thinking something like ‘well if I can’t have her then nobody can!’ Although we are worlds apart, figuratively and literally, there was always some small part of me that thought that maybe, just maybe, under the right circumstances we would meet and fall in love and get married and live happily ever after. Well that insane hope is now definitely squashed. I’ll just have to focus my attentions onto Rachel McAdams, again with the same insane hope that faces improbable odds. To marry your spouse you effectively have to renounce every other women in the world. It’s a strange way of looking at it. I have often seen myself with many women but the reality of actually choosing one for the rest of my mortal life is quite something. I don’t think any one person can fulfil all the needs of the other, however much it might be a loving and faithful marriage. There is always some part of us that is yearning and calling out for something more. This is not a bad thing. It just proves that that we are human and we are shackled by our human failings and limitations. I think Saint Augustine summed it up perfectly: Thou hast created us for Thyself, and our heart is not quiet until it rests in Thee.